This month, Phoebe Bridgers runs the gauntlet of our random, stupid queries.
Hello. How are you?
Hi, I’m pretty good, but my hair is still wet.
What have you been up to today?
Woke up at 7, got in the tour van, and went to Whole Foods because punk is dead.
Tell us a secret about yourself?
I have never seen Apocalypse Now.
What’s your biggest accomplishment?
Learning how to say no.
What’s the best song you’ve written or played on?
‘Smoke Signals’ is the best lyrically.
When’s your birthday?
17th August.
How punk are you out of ten?
I wash my hair every day with special shampoo and take 45-minute baths regularly, but my best friend in high school was a mall goth who screamed at teachers so my association maybe a 4.
Who was your favourite musician or band when you were 14?
Bright Eyes.
If you could have a superpower of your choosing, what would it be?
Telepathy, so I could fly and move shit with my brain.
Were you a rebel at school?
I was straight edge, but I got bad grades and skipped class a lot.
Which of your songs does your mum like most?
She likes the deep cuts I don’t even play anymore.
Have you ever written a fan letter?
I think once in High School to someone with an ASMR YouTube channel.
Have you ever won anything?
Mutton busting in a rodeo when I was 9 and a couple of battle of the bands.
What is your earliest memory?
Hard to know. Peeling glue off my hands maybe. Or going to Adventure City.
What compliment would you most like to receive?
Either high musical praise or that I have great eyebrows.
Do you believe in aliens?
Yes.
What’s your worst habit?
Lashing out when I’m frustrated and picking my nose.
What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
Broke into the Huntington Gardens in the middle of the night and climbed on a giant tomb.
Have you got any secret tattoos?
Nope.
If you could win a lifetime supply of anything, what would you choose?
Never wavering attention from whoever my current crush is.
Taken from the June issue of Dork, out now.